Business jokes

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On the first day his son joined the family firm, the founder took him on to the roof of the factory building and said,

'I am going to give you your very first lesson in business. Stand on the edge of the roof.'

Reluctantly, the boy went to stand on the edge of the roof.

'Now,' said his father, 'when I say, "Jump," I want you to jump off the roof.'

'But, Dad,' said the boy, 'there's a huge drop!'

'Do you want to succeed in business?'

'Yes, Dad.'

'And you trust me, don't you?'

'Yes, Dad.'

'So do as I say and jump.'

The boy jumped. He crashed to the ground and lay there, winded and bruised. His father went racing down the stairs and ran up to him.

That was your first lesson in business, son.

Never trust anyone.'

Rating: 2.0 |

There was once a high-powered businessman who insisted on taking his three secretaries everywhere with him - a tall one for writing longhand, a short one for taking down shorthand, and a very small one for adding footnotes.

Rating: 3.8 |

Mom and Dad are in the iron and steel business.
She does the ironing and he does the stealing.

Rating: 1.4 |

Kowalski, fresh out of accounting school, went to a interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, "What is three times seven?"

"Twenty-two," Kowalski replied.

After he left, he double-checked it on his calculator (he knew he should have taken it to the interview!) and realized he wouldn't get the job.

About two weeks later, he got a letter that said he was hired for the job! He was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but was still very curious.

The next day, Kowalski went in and asked why he got the job, even though he got such a simple question wrong. The boss shrugged and said, "Well, you were the closest."

Rating: 3.0 |

Two government economists were returning home from a field meeting. As with all government travelers, they were assigned the cheapest seats on the plane so they each were occupying the center seat on opposite sides of the aisle.

They continued their discussion of the knotty problem that had been the subject of their meeting through takeoff and meal service until finally one of the passengers in an aisle seat offered to trade places so they could talk and he could sleep.

After switching seats, one economist remarked to the other that it was the first time an economic discussion ever kept anyone awake.

Rating: 3.0 |

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